Not long ago, I went back to Texas for my college roommate’s wedding.

One of my favorite things to do when I meet couples is to ask them how they met.  Every time I hear their stories, I feel enchanted.  The way they tell their stories is always so vivid!  They remember every detail as if it was yesterday and share it with such enthusiasm and passion that you can’t help but smile.

When I hear excitement in their story from both the man and the woman, that’s when I know their marriage will probably last.

However, I’ve always been curious about a much bigger question.  After you’ve been dating someone for a while, how do you know if he or she is the one?

How do you know it’s time for you to take it to the next level?

The Seduction Community never really addresses relationship questions.  They only teach you how to meet and attract the girl… but what do you do after that?  How do you know if someone is good for you?  How do you maintain the relationship?

Is marriage just the natural progression of “we’ve been together for a while so it just felt right for us to get married” or is it more about “I absolutely love this person and can’t imagine living and growing with someone else”?

Every time I’ve asked one of my friends who recently got married that question, I get a different answer.

Seriously, how do you know?

For once, I think I have my own answer.

You see, I have a friend who’s been dating a guy for at least 5 years now… maybe longer.  She just bought a house and is planning on allowing her boyfriend to move in with her.  From what I hear, she has a lot of doubts about the future of her relationship with him.

After moving in with him for less than a week, she’s discovering sides of him that she’s never known… for example, she’s discovered how he’s very obsessive about making everything match in the house… or how he wants things a certain way.

When I heard that, I couldn’t help myself get frustrated:  how could you not know that about him?  You’ve been dating him for 5+ years!

However, my blog today is not about whether or not you truly know a person after an x amount of time.  It’s about knowing if he or she is the one.

And let me tell you, looking back at my friend, I don’t recall her ever being truly excited about him.  Every time I asked about her relationship, she always tells me it’s going alright or good… but there was always something seemingly missing.  He always had something that was not good enough for her.

That’s when it dawned on me.

Listen to your feelings more.

Listen to your heart more.

Knowing if someone is the one is not about logic.  It’s a feeling, it’s almost an urge.

It really doesn’t matter how long you’ve been dating someone to know if he or she is the one.  For my friend in question, she’s giving herself more time to figure out if he’s the one by letting her boyfriend move in with her… but the reality is… it doesn’t matter how long she’s been with him.

When you think of that person today, do you feel excited about him or her every day?

When you think of a future together, do you care about whether or not he/she is in the picture?

When you look at the past together, do you look at it with fondness and gratefulness?

When you think of that person romantically and sexually, does your mind wander into wild happy naughty la la land?

All in all, do you feel at the same time cherished and grateful to have that person in your life?

I guess the saying is right.  ”You’ll know when you find him or her”.

So let me ask you, how do you know if he or she is the one?

If you have been dating someone for a long time, is your relationship moving forward towards something or are you just wasting time because you are comfortable with each other?

There’s one thing we can’t teach you at David Wygant, it’s getting that feeling.  But we CAN teach you to be honest with yourself, to be genuine, to be powerful and attractive to people… so that when you do meet the one, you’ll know.

What is the funniest story you’ve ever heard?

I thought I heard it all…  from weird, to funny, to sad to inpsiring but I got to say, my clients sure know how to keep me entertained.  This one definitely takes the cake!

So here I am, talking to a former bootcamp client on the phone.  He’s updating me on his progress since he took coaching with us a few months back.

When he came to us, he was successful in his career but like many men, he wanted higher quality women in his life.

First thing I taught him was to not be so funny.  I know I know… women say they like a man with a sense of humor… but there’s a difference between being funny like a clown and just being fun.

I prefer my clients to be fun, not funny.

If a woman was to laugh, I’d rather have her laugh because of the great chemistry and tension you two share rather than because you used the latest joke or tease on her.

With him, he was TOO funny.  He would turn many regular conversations into something humorous.  Being funny was good for the first 5 minutes but after that, it distracted women from actually connecting with him on a more real and genuine level.

The second thing I taught him was to develop the lover side of him.  The way he spoke was too platonic, not flirty enough, not sensual/sexy enough.  I told him to work on his voice and speak with a more sexually mischievous undertone.  I also told him to work on his eye contact and smile.

At their core, women respond to what they feel when they are with you.  They choose to go out with you if they feel you are an exciting man.

If the first thing that comes out of their mouth when they think of you is “nice guy,” then you aren’t doing a good job showing your personality.

You want to be memorable!

So based on these 2 suggestions alone, my client started to have an abundance of dates.  Women were just responding to him much more positively than before and going on dates with them was becoming simpler and simpler every day for him.

He was having a blast, but little did he know that the most fun part of dating is that you never know where things may end.  So here comes our story.  Today’s modern tale of romance starts on the fourth date, with a girl he met at a friend’s wedding.

Hit the jump button to read the story. Read the rest of this entry »

There are times when I am amazed at the kind of honesty and deep kind of stuff I get to talk about with my guy friends late at night.

If you’ve read my blog for a while, you know I am all about demystifying incorrect beliefs.  I’m all about thinking and living life in a way that helps you achieve the things you set yourself to achieve.

So today, I decided to share with you my raw self.  You get to see me chat honestly about life and dating.  You get to see a side of me that not everyone gets to see unless you know me for a while… or unless you do long-a coaching with me.

Manuel is a friend of mine I’ve mentioned in a previous blog.  He was the jock who needed help with dating.  I’ve helped him for a few months and boy oh boy, he has come a long way since then.  Let’s just say he’s been having some fun.

A lot of the concepts I teach in bootcamps or in private coaching sessions are stuff I’ve experienced and studied myself… and more importantly, stuff that I have experimented with by teaching it to friends to see how it affects their lives.  That’s how I know whether the stuff I talk about works or not.

Grab yourself a cup of coffee or whatever your favorite drink is before reading.

It is a long post but you have plenty of time!!!  You have all the time in your life actually because…  well… we ARE talking about life.

1:16:18 AM Manuel : we tend to get lazy
1:16:22 AM Manuel : in relationships
1:16:23 AM Manuel : men
1:16:30 AM Manuel : don’t you think
1:16:30 AM Khiem : no… I typically don’t
1:16:37 AM Manuel : hmm
1:16:39 AM Khiem : b/c I put a high emphasis on always appreciating
1:16:52 AM Khiem : if I keep the idea of rewarding her behaviors by showing appreciation in various forms
1:16:55 AM Khiem : it keeps her hooked
1:17:04 AM Khiem : so I may get lazy on initiating sex
1:17:08 AM Khiem : but I don’t get lazy in the relationship
1:20:35 AM Manuel : yes, I meant in terms of sex
1:20:45 AM Manuel : sometimes I feel like the fact that it is guaranteed
1:20:52 AM Manuel : makes us take it for granted a little bit
1:20:57 AM Khiem : well maybe for you
1:21:01 AM Khiem : I try to not take it for granted
1:21:01 AM Manuel : in relationships
1:21:03 AM Khiem : b/c I told you before
1:21:07 AM Manuel : hahaha
1:21:08 AM Khiem : if you don’t do the effort to keep her happy
1:21:09 AM Manuel : i know
1:21:14 AM Khiem : her eyes and heart will start to wander
1:21:19 AM Khiem : it’s your job to keep her hooked
1:21:19 AM Manuel : YOU are the Supafreak
1:21:31 AM Khiem : just as it’s her job to seduce us with her femininity
1:22:19 AM Manuel : makes sense
1:22:35 AM Manuel : do you feel that requires a lot of attention on the man’s part? Read the rest of this entry »