I’ve been meaning to post my review of the PUA Summit 2010 for a long time now… but never got around to it.  I know it’s many months late but sometimes, you just get distracted by other more pressing things… like life and break-ups and family and jobs… etc.

So here it is today, for your leisurely reading:

For the past 3 years, I’ve attended the PUA Summit.

The first year I went, it was an exhilarating experience because I haven’t met a lot of the gurus at the time.  I was excited to meet all the guys that I’ve heard so much online about or in the book “The Game.”

There was a lot for me to like.  I got to see the vibe and the mannerism that each of the PUA had.  Because I was helping with the event, I got to interact with them naturally in ways where they didn’t have to hold up their “in the spotlight” persona.

In essence, I got to see for myself if they were the kind of guy I wanted to emulate or even hang out with outside of meeting women.

Being able to feel the vibe of these guys was really the coolest part of the PUA Summit for me.  If you are to go, THAT should be your real reason to go.

If you missed my first 2007 PUA Summit review, you can read it part 1 here, part 2 here… and another female perspective of it here.

However, I also found a lot not to like.  There were definitely parts of the Summit that felt weird to me… or mindsets that were promoted as dogma that were just plain unhealthy in my opinion.

Last year for example, I brought my now ex-girlfriend there to attend with me.  One of the most awkward moment for me was how one of the PUAs I introduced her to quickly turned to me after he acknowledged her and said right in front of her:  “Congratulations Khiem, she’s hot!!!”  I was mortified.  I’m sure he meant what he said as a compliment but I can only imagine how she must have felt.  She must have felt like a mere piece of ass instead of a human being.

I expected a little bit more social suaveness from that particular PUA since he actually teach guys how to meet women.

Every year since then has been more or less of the same story for me.  I like going because I get to see what’s happening in the Community.  I like going because I get to see some of the really cool guys I haven’t talked to in a while like Adam Lyons.  I like going because I get a little glimpse of what the latest teaching trends in the industry are.  More importantly, I like going because I get to watch how each guru has evolved over time.

At the same time, every year, I dread going because there’s always something weird about it there.  When you are taking a break in the middle of the day under beautiful California sun, how do you explain seeing at least 50 guys walking around dressed as if it was already night time and they were all ready to go clubbing?

There has to be a rule somewhere in the secret PUA guide book that says “PLEASE DRESS APPROPRIATELY FOR THE VENUE AND TIME OF DAY YOU ARE SEEN AT.”  I’m fine with peacocking or wearing bling bling to contrast your dark colored clothes to draw attention to yourself but there HAS to be a limit to how much you need to stand out to catch a girl’s attention.  Do you really have to always stick out like a sore thumb?

Hasn’t learning pick-up taught you anything about what truly attracts someone to you?  Your personality is the real attractor here, not the way you dress.

Overall, I found the PUA Summit 2010 to be much better than the previous ones.  I only attended the Saturday portion but I appreciated the fact that they hosted it inside Level 3 club because it allowed for a much more enjoyable experience.  They had plenty of seats for people to sit and they had plenty of space for people to just walk around without bumping into each other.  It wasn’t as claustrophobic as the other years. (more…)

I always love a good PUA story.

As much time as PUAs spend on learning advanced social and dating skills, they aren’t always so subtle (or good) when they are talking to women.

I can always smell them!

Last month, I went with David Wygant to the PUA Summit 2009 in Hollywood for his talk.  I knew that if I brought my girflriend, I might have to protect her from guys oogling at her… or worse, from guys trying to practice their recently learned techniques on her.  Nonetheless, I decided to take her along.

I’ve told her about the Seduction Community before.  She’s never seen anything Community related so she was pretty excited to discover what this whole movement was about.

As I arrived at the Renaissance hotel, I started scanning the room for familiar faces.  There were quite a lot more people this time around that I didn’t know.  I guess that’s what happens when I don’t actively keep in touch with people in the Community.  I definitely wasn’t familiar with some of the speakers listed on the schedule.

We entered the room quietly in the middle of Adam Lyon’s speech and sat in the back.  I love Adam!  I think the world of him.  He and his wife Amanda are the nicest people.  I wish I’d get to see them more often but as much as I like him, I didn’t like his speech as much as the other years.  As a speaker, he’s absolutely fantastic!  He always wow the crowd with his humor and stories.  What I didn’t like was his message (at least the part of the message I caught).

In his talk, he explained to the guys how you can almost guarantee success in transitioning to sex with a woman by justifying your every move… even if it didn’t completely make logical sense.  As long as you give a seemingly valid reason to why you are doing this or that with her, why you are leading her somewhere, she will follow.

From a psychological perspective, that’s pretty interesting!  It shows you that people don’t really think for themselves that much.  As long as what you are doing makes some sense and that you do it with enough conviction, people will just follow.  Honestly, it’s kind of scary to me.  It just shows me how stupid we really are as human beings, but oh well…

The reason I didn’t like his message is simple.

In my world, if you are a powerful and genuine guy who kind of embodies the lover for women, you don’t have to justify anything!  Sex with you just happens (or so that’s what women say)!  It feels like a fairy tale.  For them, being with you feels natural and right.  It just happens because you understand how women get turned on.  You understand that women love the idea of being swept away… and YOU are that guy who lets them live their own romantic comedy or sexual fantasy through you!

If you have to justify anything to her, you probably didn’t do a good job at making her feel (more…)

I have a love and hate relationship with the PUA Summit.

On one hand, I love it!

It’s the one place where you can openly discuss dating and pickup with other similar minded people.  It’s the one event where you can meet and talk directly to the gurus you’ve learned and read from on the internet for years!

I would be a hypocrite if I didn’t admit that I learned a lot from it when I was still exploring the Pickup Community.

It’s thanks to the PUA Summit that I connected with Johnny Wolf, Vince Kelvin, Adam Lyons and other really nice guys!

This year, they had some of the big names again:  David Wygant, Adam Lyons, Speer, Asian Playboy, Hypnotica, Mehow, Daniel Rose, Bad Boy, Brad P., DJ Fuji and many more!  They even had Kosmo speak there.  If you forgot, he’s the season 2 winner of Mystery’s reality TV show “The Pickup Artist” on VH1.

No matter what you are expecting from a convention like this, you won’t be disappointed.  If you need a few new techniques to add to your arsenal of seduction skills, many of the speakers will share with you what they know.  If you wanted to ask some of them about your personal situation, you can get some quick Q&A in after each presentation.  If you just wanted to wrap yourself around the mindset behind how to be a cool and attractive guy, you’d get that too!

It’s at events like the PUA Summit that you can find out for yourself who’s the real deal.  Which guru do you connect and relate to the most?  How do you like their vibe?  How do you like how they carry themselves?  This is where you can find out if you really want to be like them, if you really want to continue learning from them.  Honestly, some of these gurus don’t have very good looking girlfriends.

Worse, I don’t know if I would consider some of these women “high quality”  (in the sense of… what do they bring to your life outside of sex and/or being your arm candy).

But again, I’m not judging here.  Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

The PUA Summit has matured a lot since its first year in 2007.   (more…)