I love my guy friends.  There are things that I can talk to them that I can’t talk with other guys.  They are the types of guys that not only know when to give me a gentle pat on the back when I feel down but who also know when to challenge me when they think I’m not being the best me.

Anyone dating them should feel lucky to be with them.  What I love most about them is that they are extremely self-aware, which makes them great socially and in relationships… but they are go-getters too.  They aren’t afraid of going after what they want… and it reflects in their dating lives too.

All my close guy friends date actively.  When they do date, they don’t have much problem attracting women but what is fascinating to me is what we divulge to each other when we discuss how we know a woman is just for fun… or when she actually means more to us than “just having fun.”

One of my friends and clients got married this past weekend too!  It was a b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l wedding.  If there is one thing I learned from that wedding, it’d be this:  Indian people know how to celebrate… and… I now know why they are so good at bargaining lol.

So without much fanfare, here’s my list of how you know when you’ve met the right woman:

1. She makes you hungry for more.  Because of her, you want to achieve so much more…  You are not only thinking about yourself anymore, you are thinking for two.
2. You go home tired but seeing your woman relieves the temporary stress you feel.  Just a few  words of encouragement from her are enough to get you ready to fight another day.
3. You feel unstoppable because she believes in you like no one else before… which sometimes actually scares you a little.
4. Even though she believes in you, she’s not afraid to challenge you too.  She helps you see the world (or yourself) in ways you sometimes haven’t thought of.  She’s not just your biggest supporter and cheerleader, she’s at all times your most respected and beloved equal.
5. You realize that ultimately (and just like you), she’s in no way flawless but she’s plenty perfect for you.  There are always other women out there but she’s the one you like and want; she’s the one you want to create something with.  The depth of intimacy and connection you already have with her is something you couldn’t recreate or have with someone else.
6. As cliche a it sounds, she actually makes you a better man.  Things you wouldn’t tolerate with others, you can tolerate with her.  Things you wouldn’t tolerate in others, you can tolerate in her.
7. Everything you do with her is fun.  It doesn’t mean that you or her don’t struggle or argue from time to time, but everything you do is easier and more fun because she’s with you.
8. People actually see you happier.  When you are together, you both kind of glow and radiate together.
9. You can actually imagine yourself growing with her, not just growing old with her, but growing as a person with her.  You not only like… but want her by your side, every step of the way.
10. You understand that even if it doesn’t work out for whatever reason, you have faith that it will.  But if it was to not work out, be it death or break-up/divorce, you wouldn’t have had it any other way.  You have and had much more to cherish with her than without her.
11. Every time you look at her, you think to yourself:  ”Wow, she’s so hot!”
12. Aside from you fantasizing of the naughtiest things you could do to her, you’ve actually thought of the kind of Mom she could be to your kids.
13. You actually feel like you’d want to give her the moon, oh wait… isn’t that called a diamond nowadays?

As you finish reading this list, I invite you to add your own bullet points in the comments section.  How do you know when a woman is right for you?

I’m also very curious about the woman’s perspective too.  I would like to believe that women can this list as their own but I invite them to share their thoughts too.  How do you know when you’ve met the man of your dream?

The first time we met, you didn’t know who or what I was.

There was something that called me over.  From first impressions, you seemed nice.  From first impressions, I was fun.

There was an air about you that intrigued me.  Maybe it was the way you talked, the way you looked, the way you smiled, the way you moved.  I do not know.

I was a little hesitant at the beginning.  Would you be worthy of me?  Would you accept me for me?

As I talked to you, you opened up to me, you shared yourself with me, you made me feel relaxed around you, you made me laugh.

Pleasurable sensations tickled my body when I was thinking about you.

As I got to know you, I felt pulled to you by that invisible force.  Was I being hooked by you or were you being hooked by me?

No matter what we did together, you seemed mesmerized by me.  It was as if you were being hypnotized by me.

Every time I laid eyes on you, I electrified the air around you, I made you giggle, I made you feel like a kid inside. (more…)

There are times when I am amazed at the kind of honesty and deep kind of stuff I get to talk about with my guy friends late at night.

If you’ve read my blog for a while, you know I am all about demystifying incorrect beliefs.  I’m all about thinking and living life in a way that helps you achieve the things you set yourself to achieve.

So today, I decided to share with you my raw self.  You get to see me chat honestly about life and dating.  You get to see a side of me that not everyone gets to see unless you know me for a while… or unless you do long-a coaching with me.

Manuel is a friend of mine I’ve mentioned in a previous blog.  He was the jock who needed help with dating.  I’ve helped him for a few months and boy oh boy, he has come a long way since then.  Let’s just say he’s been having some fun.

A lot of the concepts I teach in bootcamps or in private coaching sessions are stuff I’ve experienced and studied myself… and more importantly, stuff that I have experimented with by teaching it to friends to see how it affects their lives.  That’s how I know whether the stuff I talk about works or not.

Grab yourself a cup of coffee or whatever your favorite drink is before reading.

It is a long post but you have plenty of time!!!  You have all the time in your life actually because…  well… we ARE talking about life.

1:16:18 AM Manuel : we tend to get lazy
1:16:22 AM Manuel : in relationships
1:16:23 AM Manuel : men
1:16:30 AM Manuel : don’t you think
1:16:30 AM Khiem : no… I typically don’t
1:16:37 AM Manuel : hmm
1:16:39 AM Khiem : b/c I put a high emphasis on always appreciating
1:16:52 AM Khiem : if I keep the idea of rewarding her behaviors by showing appreciation in various forms
1:16:55 AM Khiem : it keeps her hooked
1:17:04 AM Khiem : so I may get lazy on initiating sex
1:17:08 AM Khiem : but I don’t get lazy in the relationship
1:20:35 AM Manuel : yes, I meant in terms of sex
1:20:45 AM Manuel : sometimes I feel like the fact that it is guaranteed
1:20:52 AM Manuel : makes us take it for granted a little bit
1:20:57 AM Khiem : well maybe for you
1:21:01 AM Khiem : I try to not take it for granted
1:21:01 AM Manuel : in relationships
1:21:03 AM Khiem : b/c I told you before
1:21:07 AM Manuel : hahaha
1:21:08 AM Khiem : if you don’t do the effort to keep her happy
1:21:09 AM Manuel : i know
1:21:14 AM Khiem : her eyes and heart will start to wander
1:21:19 AM Khiem : it’s your job to keep her hooked
1:21:19 AM Manuel : YOU are the Supafreak
1:21:31 AM Khiem : just as it’s her job to seduce us with her femininity
1:22:19 AM Manuel : makes sense
1:22:35 AM Manuel : do you feel that requires a lot of attention on the man’s part? (more…)