I remember high school days… when all the boys and all the girls wanted to know one thing about the opposite sex:  how do I make him or her like me?

Even in college, attracting the opposite sex was a rather elusive endeavor for me.  How do I get her to notice me?  How do I let her know that I want to be more than friends?  Should I be funny around her?  Do I just act nice?  Do I give her a compliment?  Maybe I should do thoughtful things to her.

There was a girl in college.  She was petite, cute, had long black silky hair, she was really funny.  There was an energy about her that just drew me to her.  I didn’t consider her to be the usual type of girl that I would be attracted to.

First, she was Asian.  I know, I know… that sounds terrible for me to say that but even though I am Asian, I am typically more attracted to non-Asian girls.  I blame the whole living and being raised in France thing for that.

Second, she had a light speech stutter.  However, that didn’t seem to bug me.  I thought it was cute!

Third, she was rather small… and that implied a small chest too.  I don’t know about you guys but I love boobs.  Yep, I said it!  Get over it

I think what drew me to her is that I found her to be such an oddity.  She didn’t make sense to me. She didn’t fit any of my preconceived notions of what an Asian girl would be like.

I’m sure you guys have heard of the stereotype.  Asian people drive Japanese cars.  Well, guess what?  She drove the biggest freaking Ford F-150 truck you could find.  With her small frame, I’d watch her climb into her truck and drive away so proudly in it.  Just the image of it still makes me chuckle.

Living in Texas at the time, I should have expected it too but she LOVED country music.  I consider myself pretty open and experimental in my taste of music but I have to admit that country music is definitely not on my preferred list of music to jam to.

Looking back at what slowly drew me to her… and what drew me to all the women I went out with, I realize something.  When it comes to me liking someone, I follow a pretty simple pattern.

First, something gets me intrigued about her.  It could be her looks because she’s just hot.  More particularly, it could be in the way she walks as in she has that weightless cloud-like demeanor to her.  It could be her energy… because she’s very passionate about something, or she shows a lot of compassion or drive for something.  It could be something she said to me… like she’s very flirty but in a non-expected way.  Basically, she would say something that makes me do a mental double take.

Then, as I get curious about her and start hanging out with her or talking to her, I notice that she’s fun.  It’s easy for me to talk to her, flirt with her, chat with her, tease her, be playful with her.  Not only it’s easy, but it feels that she “gets me.”  As we have fun together, we connect not on facts… but on an emotional level.  She either looks at life the same way I do or she makes me look at life in a new and cool way.

Finally, I see in her that she’s comfortable with herself, not just emotionally but physically too… which in turn makes me even more comfortable around her.  No matter what we do, there’s an undercurrent of sexual tension.  We can talk about life, family and work but we are also comfortable touching each other, using light sexual innuendos with one another, bantering… etc.  Nothing she says comes from a place of trying to impress me.  She’s her own woman, she speaks her own mind and act for her own pleasure and deep inside, she knows I want her… and I know she wants me.

So why am i sharing this with you?  Because once you realize how you feel about yourself and how you interact with your world, it’s easy for you to figure out how to make someone like you.

Interestingly, the simple truth is no one can MAKE someone like you.  But by being who you are, by the way you interact with your surroundings, by the things you project about yourself, you can influence her emotions to see you the way you hope she sees you.

There are 3 skills that I consistently notice lacking in people that come to me for help (There’s actually a fourth skill but it’s not really a skill as much as it is your ability to (more…)

I’ve been meaning to start a series of articles that takes a humorous angle on sex.  No matter how good you are… or how bad… sex is really funny sometimes!

If you are new to my blog, you should definitely read my Kill The Mood Please blog as well as my Most Unlikely Orgasm for Men blog.  I promise you, you’ll never look at sex the same way!  If anything, it will give you a good laugh and put you in a good mood for the weekend

Today, I don’t have a funny sex story for you but I was browsing some of my old documents for inspiration and I came across this nice little write-up that an ex-girlfriend of mine wrote a while back.  I won’t tell you if any of it was inspired by me or not but in either case, you’ll get the benefit of it!  So here it is, in all its glory, for your titillating reading pleasures.

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A lot of men want to be great lovers but they never take the time to ask the woman if they are satisfied with their love making skills.

Women like to have all their senses stimulated.  It’s how you touch her and caress her, how you talk to her and build a connection, how you look at her, how you whisper to her, how you can create and build up desire and affection.  I can’t tell you how many times I have been disappointed in bed by selfish lovers. [Editor's note:  or emotionless lovers]

Men assume that having sex only involves minimal foreplay and go straight to fucking… which usually lasts about 5 to 10 minutes.  It’s just a release for them.  For most women, that’s not even enough to have a (good) orgasm.  Men need to take the time to stimulate the woman’s senses and imagination.

I had an ex-boyfriend who would only be interested in sex for one round, maybe two.  We’d get to business and once he was done, he wasn’t interested in more.  I was just starting to get into it!  It was so frustrating…

I would recommend at least 20 minutes with foreplay which involves kissing, oral pleasure, or even something playful like feathers and blindfolds.  If you really want to get more playful, you can try whipped cream and chocolate syrup to lick off of each other.  Just have fun!  Get creative with it!

After foreplay, don’t immediately start fucking her.  You need to build anticipation so she can have a bigger, stronger (maybe longer) orgasm.  Make her want more.  Tease her a bit with the tip of your dick against her pussy and slowly insert the tip… but not going in all the way.  Slowly insert the tip about 7 to 8 times and then, (more…)

Nothing makes me happier when I have someone wanting to write a guest blog!  The purpose of Kiss N’ Tale is not only for me to share with you guys what I have experienced and observed in the world of dating… but also for you guys to share the funny or interesting sides of finding love.

So if you ever want to share something insightful or comical, don’t hesitate to email me!

Today, I have Cooper wanting to share with you guys a little story.

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My girlfriend and I got together as many people do.  I met her via another friend and got to know her casually before I realized I felt something extra with her… there was an extra spark.

We naturally started seeing each other more and more.  Things moved forward from there.  There was a point where desire caught fire and we couldn’t resist fooling around a little bit.

Just as with any new burgeoning relationship, I was wondering exactly how far I could take things, what turned her on, what would get her excited, what would make her want more etc.

I definitely remember some times where awkwardness played a fun role as we figured each other out.  If you’re like me, you prefer things start out less intense instead of too wild, certainly not boring by any means but you can always intensify things up from there.  I like to feel my new partner out at first, ask her questions about what she likes before our naughty intentions completely take over.  I like to say things like, “Where should I kiss you…” and smile as I test her with a little smack on the ass and say, “Yeah, you like that?”

Everyone is naughty, some more than others.  Some won’t allow themselves to wander in the realm of sexual imagination whereas others want things that most of us wouldn’t even dare imagine.  All of that is perfectly fine and I find myself to be somewhere in the middle.  I sometimes chuckle, maybe out of embarrassment, when someone says something dirty but what I’m really thinking is, “Oh yeah baby, bring it on.”

Dirty talk is really the best (and I’m not talking about the lame porn style way either.  That’s just not hot).  If you haven’t done so yet, you’re missing out!  You just have to feel your partner out and see how much she enjoys it and how comfortable she is with it.  Start slow.  Don’t take it too far, try some nibbling with a little love smacking and some vocal “ooo’s”, “ahh’s” and “you like that, don’t you?” I know that dirty talking my girl certainly revs my engine up!  I know she enjoys it too.

Then move up from there… maybe even to full blown verbal role plays.   (more…)