I’ve been meaning to start a series of articles that takes a humorous angle on sex.  No matter how good you are… or how bad… sex is really funny sometimes!

If you are new to my blog, you should definitely read my Kill The Mood Please blog as well as my Most Unlikely Orgasm for Men blog.  I promise you, you’ll never look at sex the same way!  If anything, it will give you a good laugh and put you in a good mood for the weekend

Today, I don’t have a funny sex story for you but I was browsing some of my old documents for inspiration and I came across this nice little write-up that an ex-girlfriend of mine wrote a while back.  I won’t tell you if any of it was inspired by me or not but in either case, you’ll get the benefit of it!  So here it is, in all its glory, for your titillating reading pleasures.

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A lot of men want to be great lovers but they never take the time to ask the woman if they are satisfied with their love making skills.

Women like to have all their senses stimulated.  It’s how you touch her and caress her, how you talk to her and build a connection, how you look at her, how you whisper to her, how you can create and build up desire and affection.  I can’t tell you how many times I have been disappointed in bed by selfish lovers. [Editor's note:  or emotionless lovers]

Men assume that having sex only involves minimal foreplay and go straight to fucking… which usually lasts about 5 to 10 minutes.  It’s just a release for them.  For most women, that’s not even enough to have a (good) orgasm.  Men need to take the time to stimulate the woman’s senses and imagination.

I had an ex-boyfriend who would only be interested in sex for one round, maybe two.  We’d get to business and once he was done, he wasn’t interested in more.  I was just starting to get into it!  It was so frustrating…

I would recommend at least 20 minutes with foreplay which involves kissing, oral pleasure, or even something playful like feathers and blindfolds.  If you really want to get more playful, you can try whipped cream and chocolate syrup to lick off of each other.  Just have fun!  Get creative with it!

After foreplay, don’t immediately start fucking her.  You need to build anticipation so she can have a bigger, stronger (maybe longer) orgasm.  Make her want more.  Tease her a bit with the tip of your dick against her pussy and slowly insert the tip… but not going in all the way.  Slowly insert the tip about 7 to 8 times and then, (more…)

Nothing makes me happier when I have someone wanting to write a guest blog!  The purpose of Kiss N’ Tale is not only for me to share with you guys what I have experienced and observed in the world of dating… but also for you guys to share the funny or interesting sides of finding love.

So if you ever want to share something insightful or comical, don’t hesitate to email me!

Today, I have Cooper wanting to share with you guys a little story.

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My girlfriend and I got together as many people do.  I met her via another friend and got to know her casually before I realized I felt something extra with her… there was an extra spark.

We naturally started seeing each other more and more.  Things moved forward from there.  There was a point where desire caught fire and we couldn’t resist fooling around a little bit.

Just as with any new burgeoning relationship, I was wondering exactly how far I could take things, what turned her on, what would get her excited, what would make her want more etc.

I definitely remember some times where awkwardness played a fun role as we figured each other out.  If you’re like me, you prefer things start out less intense instead of too wild, certainly not boring by any means but you can always intensify things up from there.  I like to feel my new partner out at first, ask her questions about what she likes before our naughty intentions completely take over.  I like to say things like, “Where should I kiss you…” and smile as I test her with a little smack on the ass and say, “Yeah, you like that?”

Everyone is naughty, some more than others.  Some won’t allow themselves to wander in the realm of sexual imagination whereas others want things that most of us wouldn’t even dare imagine.  All of that is perfectly fine and I find myself to be somewhere in the middle.  I sometimes chuckle, maybe out of embarrassment, when someone says something dirty but what I’m really thinking is, “Oh yeah baby, bring it on.”

Dirty talk is really the best (and I’m not talking about the lame porn style way either.  That’s just not hot).  If you haven’t done so yet, you’re missing out!  You just have to feel your partner out and see how much she enjoys it and how comfortable she is with it.  Start slow.  Don’t take it too far, try some nibbling with a little love smacking and some vocal “ooo’s”, “ahh’s” and “you like that, don’t you?” I know that dirty talking my girl certainly revs my engine up!  I know she enjoys it too.

Then move up from there… maybe even to full blown verbal role plays.   (more…)

Don’t you hate those couples who always seem to be in love?

You know… they are those couples who are always kissing, always smiling, always laughing, always holding hands.  It doesn’t matter where they are, they are always showing some form of public display of affection (PDA).

What’s up with them, huh?  Don’t they have a little bit of common decency for other people’s feelings?  I mean… not everyone wants to see that, right?

It’s so cheesy!  It’s so corny!…  Or is it?!?

You know what?  Get over it!

Kisses… Gotta love’em

I’m the kind of guy who likes to kiss his girlfriend in public.  I’m the kind of guy who likes to hold her hand while driving.  I’m the kind of guy who makes you wish you had a girlfriend with you right now on your arm.  I’m the guy who makes his girl feel like she’s living her own romantic comedy.

My buddy Jack hates it!  He gets all frustrated when my girlfriend and I get fishy faced.  It’s so funny to me.

This past weekend, I was having dinner with a bunch of friends in San Diego.  We were at an Indian restaurant in the Gaslamp District and as I came back from the bathroom, my girlfriend passed me to go there herself.  Before I let her through, I stopped her, gave her a quick peck and continued on.  My friend Mike says with his most authentic Nashville accent:  ”Awww… look at’em.  Khiem just stopped his girlfriend in the middle of the restaurant to give her a kiss!”

To which… one of the girls at our table immediately blurted out:  ”Awww shit…”

The entire group bursted out in laughter.

You may wonder:  did I really have to?  No.  Did I really want to?  Yes.  But as much as some of you hate PDA, I think I may know a thing or two about women that you may not know.

Turn her on, all the time.  Keep her hot and bothered inside.  Keep the sexual tension building up throughout the day.  Keep her connected to you by  the way you look at her, by the way you touch her, by the way you talk to her, by the way you kiss her… and let me tell you, I guarantee you that by the end of the day, you’ll have the best time of your life.  I did.  You’ve never seen more sparks fly before.

So next time you see a couple getting all lovey dovey, don’t be one of those “Awww shit…” people.  Ask yourself:  ”I wonder what kind of sex these two are having.”  More likely than not, they’re having a hellavu better time than you are.

If you find yourself hating PDA that much, are you afraid of your own sexuality?  Maybe you hate seeing people being affectionate because it reminds you that you are really lonely inside.

You may learn a thing or two from me.  I’m the guy who makes your girlfriend wish I was her boyfriend.  I’m the guy who makes her scream at night.  I’m the guy who makes her come back over and over again.

Can you be the lover for the women in your life?

If you are interested in live coaching, the David Wygant bootcamp in Los Angeles for Halloween is pretty much sold out.  However, we have another one coming up in December!  If you are curious on what kind of coaching we do… or how we can help you, give me a call.  I give everyone a free 20 minutes consultation and you can tell me all about your dating woes.