Archive for the ‘First Impressions’ Category
    February 28th, 2011  (1)
The (Bondage) Girl Who Got Away…
Posted by Khiem in: Articles, First Impressions

I saw her from across the room.  She was standing there with a girlfriend of hers.  It seems they were checking the room out, probably looking for cute guys to hover by.  They talked among themselves as if deciding whether to stay on the roof top patio or go back down towards the inside bar.

I chuckled to myself… almost reading their mind from afar.  I think she saw me… and for a few seconds, we just locked eyes.  They talked to each other again.

She was dressed in a black leather sailor outfit.  I think her hair was up.  I can’t quite remember anymore.  Everything around me seems like a blur now.  A few friends of mine were trying to flirt with some scantily clad women.  We were at the Hollywood Bondage Ball after all… my first one too.

Bondage girl

For some reason, my mind was in a daze… I was still breathing in all the hustle and bustle of a world still foreign to me.  I’ve never found myself in a room filled with such openly sexual energy before… the scent of leather… the smell of skin… the clonking of metal strappings and handcuffs… the loud music…

Everything in the room was meant to electrify your senses.

Within seconds of our gaze meeting, she started walking in my direction with her girlfriend leading the way.  I watched almost in slow motion as they parted the sea of people to make way towards me.  Her dark brown hair flowed in the breeze, caressing her open shoulders with each of her steps.  Looking at her from top to bottom, I could see myself get lost admiring her long legs, semi-covered by lacy leather black boots.

I thought for sure her girlfriend was the one coming for me.  She was Asian, dressed like the sexy slave version of Marylyn Monroe, petite and cute with wildly frizzy satin black hair.  Little did she know I usually prefer non-Asian women.

As they pretended to walk past me, I stopped them, started talking to them.  I had nothing in mind to say but somehow, very quickly, I said something that made them laugh.  An acquaintance of mine jumped in the conversation and claimed the Asian girl for himself.  I didn’t object.  My attention was on someone else.

Her and I spoke easily.  I was afraid I might fumble on my words but she seemed shy… almost nervous talking to me.  I didn’t expect that.  She seemed so confident just a few moments ago.  I don’t remember saying anything particularly funny but she kept on chuckling and laughing at my words.  As we kept talking, I made her lean against the cold wall nearby, with my own arm leaning against the wall over her head.  I spoke close to her ears, our face flirting with each other, with cheeks almost touching.

She smelled so delicious.  Her breathing felt warm against my chest.  Her eyes started glistening at me.  I felt the same thing too.  I wanted to taste her lips but held off.  I wanted to linger in the tension we both felt.

She must have felt it too.  Not long after, without warning, she jumped on my neck and kissed me.  Our lips wrestled a few more times, with me sometimes gently sucking and biting her tongue and with her occasionally licking the contour of my mouth.

What magic was at work, I did not know.

Unfortunately, by the end of the night, with no reasonable way of seeing each other again, she was the one who vanished away.  Her name was Whitney.  She was a student from Fresno.  Four years ago, she showed me that when tension is in the air, nothing’s harder to resist… even for two strangers.

I still ponder…  What was it about her?  What was it about me?…


A couple weekends ago, I was discussing the art of first impressions with a client and how much easier it is to attract and go on dates if you learn to create positive first and lasting impressions.  So this week, with time permitting, I’ll try to write various little stories from my own life that will show you that creating good first impressions allows you to influence how people perceive you and therefore how more likely you are to attract the person of your choice.

It’s always easier to attract someone when you set the bar high for yourself rather than setting the bar low and working your way back up.

To quote an ex-girlfriend of mine:

There’s a reason why the saying goes “Love at first sight,” not “Love at first personality!”

Whether you are conscious of it or not, everything you do, say or wear say something about you.  So what are you saying about yourself to the world right now?

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    October 22nd, 2009  (5)
I Smell Poo-ahh (PUA)
Posted by Khiem in: Articles, First Impressions

I always love a good PUA story.

As much time as PUAs spend on learning advanced social and dating skills, they aren’t always so subtle (or good) when they are talking to women.

I can always smell them!

Last month, I went with David Wygant to the PUA Summit 2009 in Hollywood for his talk.  I knew that if I brought my girflriend, I might have to protect her from guys oogling at her… or worse, from guys trying to practice their recently learned techniques on her.  Nonetheless, I decided to take her along.

I’ve told her about the Seduction Community before.  She’s never seen anything Community related so she was pretty excited to discover what this whole movement was about.

As I arrived at the Renaissance hotel, I started scanning the room for familiar faces.  There were quite a lot more people this time around that I didn’t know.  I guess that’s what happens when I don’t actively keep in touch with people in the Community.  I definitely wasn’t familiar with some of the speakers listed on the schedule.

We entered the room quietly in the middle of Adam Lyon’s speech and sat in the back.  I love Adam!  I think the world of him.  He and his wife Amanda are the nicest people.  I wish I’d get to see them more often but as much as I like him, I didn’t like his speech as much as the other years.  As a speaker, he’s absolutely fantastic!  He always wow the crowd with his humor and stories.  What I didn’t like was his message (at least the part of the message I caught).

In his talk, he explained to the guys how you can almost guarantee success in transitioning to sex with a woman by justifying your every move… even if it didn’t completely make logical sense.  As long as you give a seemingly valid reason to why you are doing this or that with her, why you are leading her somewhere, she will follow.

From a psychological perspective, that’s pretty interesting!  It shows you that people don’t really think for themselves that much.  As long as what you are doing makes some sense and that you do it with enough conviction, people will just follow.  Honestly, it’s kind of scary to me.  It just shows me how stupid we really are as human beings, but oh well…

The reason I didn’t like his message is simple.

In my world, if you are a powerful and genuine guy who kind of embodies the lover for women, you don’t have to justify anything!  Sex with you just happens (or so that’s what women say)!  It feels like a fairy tale.  For them, being with you feels natural and right.  It just happens because you understand how women get turned on.  You understand that women love the idea of being swept away… and YOU are that guy who lets them live their own romantic comedy or sexual fantasy through you! 😛

If you have to justify anything to her, you probably didn’t do a good job at making her feel (more…)

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    April 12th, 2008  (2)
Meeting The “Man Transformation” Seminar’s Dating Experts
Posted by Khiem in: Announcements & News, Articles, First Impressions

This week, I got to tag along David Wygant to David DeAngelo’s “Double Your Dating:  Man Transformation” seminar.

David Wygant had a speech to do and as usual, he rocked it.  His energy is absolutely amazing when in front of an audience. 

When he gets on stage, he just gets in the zone.  He never prepares his speech.  Everything is in his head and I think that’s what makes him so good.  He knows his stuff so well that he just get into that flow state. He gets in the moment and everything comes out naturally.

For this seminar, he brought a grapefruit on stage and asked one courageous volunteer to come up.  He then explained:  “I want you to catch the grapefruit. I’m going to roll it either fast or slow.  It’s up to you to catch it.”  Without much of a warning, he then rolled the grapefruit fast towards the volunteer.  The guy missed the grapefruit completely and had to chase it down the stage.

This is what most men do wrong.  They spend their life chasing after women.

The audience went crazy with the analogy.  David moved on to talk about how men need to learn to attract women instead of chasing them.  Men need to learn to have purpose, have passion, be able to observe and listen to truly connect with women on a deeper, higher level.

I’m not going to lie.  I like working with David.  He has a very healthy lifestyle and mindset.  Sometimes, I feel he could teach a little bit more technical stuff for the guys who truly don’t get it but he doesn’t… and I know why.  He really wants guys to understand the habits and behaviors of being an attractive man.  If you “get it”, techniques don’t matter as much.

However, David is not the only dating expert I like to hang around or hear from.  There are a lot of other dating experts and gurus that teach some truly amazing things.

At the “Man Transformation” seminar, I was very happy to see Vin DiCarlo again.  He’s one of my favorite guys in the Community because his writing has always resonated with me.  He’s the guy who coined the term “Natural Game” for the Seduction Community a few years back.

If you were to meet him, you’d think of him as a totally normal guy unlike some of the other Pick-Up Artists (PUAs) out there.  Ask him about his Star Wars collectibles collection sometimes or if you are into music, ask him about his rockstar aspirations.

Maybe I like him because I’m a Star Wars geek too.

The only difference between you and him is that he just gets laid a whole lot more than you ;p

He’s definitely a bit more of a Pick-Up Artist than a dating kinda guy but his methodoly has always been about bringing your most natural masculine behaviors out without asking you to manipulate women into liking you.  Some of his advanced techniques can definitely be misused by ill-intentioned men towards women but that’s the nature of things.  You can use any pool of knowledge for good or evil.

As I was networking with David, I didn’t realized that I completely missed Vin’s presentation.  Bummer!  I was really looking forward to hearing what he had to say.

I did get to chat with him a little bit though.  He’s releasing a new e-book called The Attraction Code which I’m pretty excited about.

He graciously sent me a copy for me to review so you can bet that I’ll be writing about it soon.  I’ve read 3/4th of the e-book already and the cool thing about Vin is that he realizes that any seduction method out there CAN work… as long as you know HOW TO THINK about attraction.

So if you want to keep yourself up-to-date on his e-book release, make sure to sign up for his VIP list right now by clicking the banner below.  He has some freebies to give away and he’ll be releasing the book to his friends and private list first.

I also got to chat a little bit with Steve Piccus.  If you don’t know him, he’s the guy behind the White Tiger Tantra DVD set.

In those videos, he teaches men how to massage a woman for optimal relaxation and blood flow so you can help her reach deeper, stronger orgasms and squirting.  I remember watching those DVDs a long time ago and wondering how Steve would be like in person.  From his long hair and cowboy/native American fashion style, I was afraid he’d be some kind of woo woo woo new age spiritual guy.

After meeting him, I can say that Steve is CRAZY!!!  He’s not insane crazy.  He’s just crazy because he’s so full of life and energy.  I was there listening to him and David Wygant speak to each other and Steve truly understands how to connect to women on a much higher level.

Steve’s 18-year old son was also present and it was interesting to watch how father and son were both so open with each other about sexuality.  So many fathers out there don’t really teach their sons anything about women.  The funniest part for me was when his son expressed his view that a lot of Pick-Up Artists (PUAs) are just “gay”.  They seemed more interested in chatting with other men than meeting women.

Now, THAT’s something to think about.  This reminds me of what Adam Lyons once said in one of his speeches: 

If you want to meet women, surround yourself with women.  Why are you going out with a bunch of dudes?

Steve Piccus is definitely a manly man.  Everything about him projects a very masculine and dominant energy.  He absolutely abhors the part of the Seduction Community that teaches men to use tricks to meet women or the part of the Community that tell guys to act or dress gay to attract women.  If you want to meet women of quality, be a man! 

Steve curses a storm when he wants to make his opinion well known.  You probably wouldn’t want him to speak if political correctness was an issue.  He’s very passionate about what he teaches and you can tell it’s important for him to have men and women connect genuinely on a spiritual and sexual level.  Just by listening to him and talking to him for a few minutes, I was just amazed at how much he knew about sensuality and health.

I sure hope David and I get to work with him in the near future.

Finally, I got to meet Brent M.  David and Brent have been friends for a long time and I’ve always heard good things about Brent.  However, I haven’t met him until a few days ago.

Brent is one of those guys who also focuses on teaching men to live an interesting lifestyle.  If you live an attractive lifestyle, women will come to you but you have to learn to let go of a lot of your fears, a lot of your outcome dependence, a lot of your insecurities.

Brent is probably one of the best dressers I’ve met in the Community.  He has a very clean yet trendy look.  He wears good jeans, very nice shoes and always sports a nice blazer/sport coat.  The way he moves is very flowing and dominant.  His image alone probably gives him a lot of attention from the kinder gender.

Besides his good fashion sense, he has long shiny hair that would make Fabio (the model for all those romance novels) jealous.  You know what?  Maybe I should nickname Brent “Fabio.”  I wonder how he’d like that.  Anyhow, I didn’t talk to him about anything significant but I know that I’d just get along with him.  There are some people you just know.  You just KNOW you’d click with them.  There’s something about their vibe that puts you at ease and makes you smile.

The “Man Transformation” seminar featured a lot of other guest speakers including Lance Mason from PU101, Mehow, Hypnotica, Grant Adams from Net2Bed, Sean Stevenson, Alex Allman (author of Revolutionary Sex) and Neil Strauss himself.  I didn’t get to hear everyone speak and I definitely didn’t talk to all of them either but it was fun for me to just SEE all these gurus in one room chatting one another up. 

There were even other major players in the industry that just came in to network.  Tyler Durden from RSD, Jae Ellis from AskRomeo and Cameron Teone from AttractWomenAnywhere were there as well.

They may be competitors when it comes to business but when you put them all in one room, they are all friends.

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