August 17th, 2012  (1)
The Player & The Art Of Seduction
Posted by Khiem in: Advice, Articles, First Impressions

I was about to post the new podcast for MTV’s Guy Code episode 4 but instead, I thought I’d share something else with you today.  If you’ve been following my blog, you’ll notice that we’ve had a couple discussions on what it means to be a player or what seduction is all about in our recent podcasts.

When I say “player,” I don’t always mean it with the typical negative connotation that most people have.  What I mean by it is the letting out of the sensual lover side that is innate in you.


I personally love to hear other people’s take on the art of seduction and I discovered this little post randomly on a while ago.  I was saving it for the right time to share it with you and today is the day.  It doesn’t seem that the original author still has it posted on her site but it is such a beautiful written piece that I feel we all need to read it for ourselves.

For your enjoyment, here’s a woman’s take on what it takes to seduce a woman.

[Editor’s Note:  I took the liberty to bold and italicize certain phrases]

The Player & The Art of Seduction

The first step to seducing a woman is to win over her mind, try to appear as genuine as you can and don’t feed her lines. A real player knows that rewards only come for those who are patient.

Now ladies, a player is not a man who gets his own and leaves a trail of broken hearts, a player is not someone who jumps from one bed to the next. A real player, is someone who lives his life like a legend, puts a woman into a passionate romance, and works his job like he built the entire company.

Seduction, is a game that forever requires leveling up. It is not lying or taking the first drunken girl back home or nagging a woman to death. It is an art and a skill. Most people will misunderstand it and think it is all about the money and the looks. Wrong. Boys you could think you’re perfect and measure up to all the others, because you have perfect teeth and a perfect body, but you are wrong and will sleep alone for a long time. If you think the amount of cash in your wallet does the trick you are wrong and your bed is a cold as your cash.

Seduction is founded on confidence. A man who does have any self confidence is nothing like a player. Without it, you’ll probably try to trap a girl with cheap pick up lines and a lame game, but honesty is more alluring to a woman as well as a man who is aware of what he truly wants who is solid and grounded.

Physical attraction is still important if you want to seduce a woman properly. You need to be well dressed and clean, you do not need to look like Brad Pitt or whoever, but you do need to look your best. I am sorry boys, but there is no second chance at first impression, and that is one thing that personally works with me. I will pay attention to it, but that doesn’t mean I am superficial for looking at the you’re dressed. Also, if you lack fashion sense, that is perfectly fine, but hygiene cannot be stressed out. Just consider good shoes, pressed pants and shirt and a classy watch. Class and seduction work together.

Harmlessness. Do not appear dangerous, this is not about high school anymore and you don’t need to be the Bad Boy anymore. Don’t expect her to give you the keys to her place, she will be cautious, but worth it. Also, smile but do not leer, do not objectify her body because a woman will notice when you are ignoring the words coming out of her mouth for her cleavage.

Charm! Seduction also is 10% projection of success, 10% appearance, 10% intelligence and 70% charm! But charm is another art, it means making a person aware that you feel good about them.

Intelligence. As a girl, I will want your mind before you body. Women are mental and emotional rather than visual and physical. Engage her thoughts and emotions with questions about who she is and what are her opinions. Don’t investigate too much or interview her, just start a thoughtful conversation. I am sorry but a man who sits next to me at a bar and starts saying random things and doesn’t know how to converse is a dick and will only make me want to get out. Avoid talking about sex, or previous relationships, that’s a real turn off.

Emotional seductiveness. That’s all in four words, excitement, excitement, excitement and spontaneity . Make her adrenaline rush without looking crazy of stalking her and she’ll be addicted to you. Women are creatures of emotions hence the estrogen hormone.

Chivalry. Most men think chivalry is dead. Wrong. That can also work in your favor if you do an act of a well trained gentleman like opening a door. I thought of it as pathetic for years because I was immature, but now it gets me all the time. Do it, I’ll like you. Learn etiquette. Conduct yourself with your best manners.

Sincerity and honesty. Be genuine, women can see the false interest easily.

Greatest turn-ons. Make her feel beautiful, all day every day. But don’t use it as a tool, so just don’t say it right before coming on to her and teasing her, or else she’ll figure out you want her sexually and only sexually.

Remember, a man paints with his brains, not with his hands.

Originally posted on

So now that you’ve done reading it, take a breather and read it again!  And when your mind starts wandering, post a few comments.

What does seduction mean to you?  What have you seen work for you or on you?  Let’s hear your stories.

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    January 17th, 2011  (2)
How to Create Sexual Tension
Posted by Jacob Khan in: Articles

sharon stone

I often get questions about how to make the first move or escalate, such as: When is the right time? How do I turn her on? When should I go for the kiss? The truth is it’s not as hard you may think it is. I know it can be confusing at times when you have read so many articles and blogs on the Internet about the escalation method. If you read what we have to teach you on here I promise you will soon experience lasting change!

Escalation starts from the moment you say hello to her. It’s the moment when your eyes meet her eyes. It’s that moment when two energy poles shift toward one another. When these two energy poles shift toward one another, something beautiful and magical happens, and it is to me one of the most sacred moments. It can be hard to comprehend, but your instincts will know it.

It’s all about how much you turn her on from the word “hello” and leave her wanting more. Below I’m going to break down some key elements you need to remember in order to create enough sexual tension so that the whole escalation thing becomes her idea.

Yes! It’s a powerful way to think about this concept because men out there think about escalating all the time, and they make it hard for themselves to really cherish, celebrate, appreciate and love women. So here I’m changing the game we play, showing you how to put the ball back in her court so escalation becomes her idea and when it becomes her idea, she will be turned by you many times more powerfully. Don’t you want that? I’m sure you’re saying YES I DO!

Now here are the key elements….

First, it begins with the way you gaze in her eyes. Her eyes are the windows to her soul. In the beginning you want to gaze in her eyes long enough to find out the color of her eyes. However, you don’t want to gaze for too long in the beginning because your gesture could come across as intimidating or creepy.

Second, use the power of your voice to your advantage. Speak slowly from your lower abdomen. True leaders speak slowly because they know their voice is worth hearing and people who speak slowly have a commanding presence. Plus, they sound a lot sexier than people who speak fast!

Third, use the power of your smile to your advantage, smiling is contagious. If you smile, people around you will smile; they will feel a warm vibe from you and will be attracted to your energy. In the beginning it’s crucial that you carry a genuine warm smile, this will help her feel comfortable in your presence. Your smile is also a turn on her for her; the way you smile will make her think about the way you would smile at her when you lay next her or on top of her in the bedroom.

Forth, hold yourself with a great posture, keep your chest up, shoulders slightly back and relaxed, and your chin is up. If you have poor posture, remind yourself often about adjusting your posture, and soon you will notice that by becoming more aware of your posture you will develop a more confident state of mind.

Fifth, be in the moment, pay attention to the conversation with intensity, and really care about what she has to say. Think about how would you feel if I made you feel like you’re the most important person in the room? You would feel amazing! That’s the energy and attention you want to give out to people. This is a huge turn on for women and as simple as it sounds a lot of men forget to do this one simple thing!

Think of escalation in terms of climbing a ladder with the right balance. So each time you see her, you want to get to know her better, get closer to her physically, and narrow the distance between the two of you. Gaze in her eyes, give her your sly smile, hold yourself with a good posture, speak slowly, and listen with intensity. When you go through all of these actions she is going to get really turned on by you!

Finally, don’t think about escalation too much when you’re with her, if you do, you will miss the right moment to kiss her because you were not paying attention. Too much thinking about escalation will get you nervous and the monkey chatter in your head will create fears that will prevent you from kissing her. If you do what I said above, and you pay attention to the moment, you will notice that you will naturally create chemistry with her and she will be really turned on by you!

By: Jacob Khan,

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    October 20th, 2009  (1)
PUA Summit 2009 Review
Posted by Khiem in: Announcements & News, Articles, Product Reviews

I have a love and hate relationship with the PUA Summit.

On one hand, I love it!

It’s the one place where you can openly discuss dating and pickup with other similar minded people.  It’s the one event where you can meet and talk directly to the gurus you’ve learned and read from on the internet for years!

I would be a hypocrite if I didn’t admit that I learned a lot from it when I was still exploring the Pickup Community.

It’s thanks to the PUA Summit that I connected with Johnny Wolf, Vince Kelvin, Adam Lyons and other really nice guys!

This year, they had some of the big names again:  David Wygant, Adam Lyons, Speer, Asian Playboy, Hypnotica, Mehow, Daniel Rose, Bad Boy, Brad P., DJ Fuji and many more!  They even had Kosmo speak there.  If you forgot, he’s the season 2 winner of Mystery’s reality TV show “The Pickup Artist” on VH1.

No matter what you are expecting from a convention like this, you won’t be disappointed.  If you need a few new techniques to add to your arsenal of seduction skills, many of the speakers will share with you what they know.  If you wanted to ask some of them about your personal situation, you can get some quick Q&A in after each presentation.  If you just wanted to wrap yourself around the mindset behind how to be a cool and attractive guy, you’d get that too!

You gotta love the half naked women in bikini or scantily clad clothes :P

Woman Half Naked = Good Ad 😛

It’s at events like the PUA Summit that you can find out for yourself who’s the real deal.  Which guru do you connect and relate to the most?  How do you like their vibe?  How do you like how they carry themselves?  This is where you can find out if you really want to be like them, if you really want to continue learning from them.  Honestly, some of these gurus don’t have very good looking girlfriends.

Worse, I don’t know if I would consider some of these women “high quality”  (in the sense of… what do they bring to your life outside of sex and/or being your arm candy).

But again, I’m not judging here.  Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

The PUA Summit has matured a lot since its first year in 2007.   (more…)

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